Liberal ‘sex symbol’ joins corporate law firm in desperate bid to hoard cash before Kamala runs for governor of California
It’s been barely a week since Doug Emhoff’s wife, Kamala Harris, stepped down as vice president after losing the 2024 election to Donald Trump, but the former second gentleman has already found a new gig defending members of the so-called oligarchy former president Joe Biden warned about in his farewell address.
Emhoff, who is best known for making out with Dr. Jill Biden next to a Holocaust survivor at the 2023 State of the Union, will join Willkie Farr & Gallagher LLP as a partner, the global white-shoe law firm announced Monday. He will advise corporate clients and private equity firms on “sensitive investigations” and “complex litigation,” as well as “matters with significant reputational concerns,” and will split his time between Los Angeles and New York, where the firm is headquartered.
Willkie Farr & Gallagher, which earned $1.5 billion in revenue in 2023, is best known for the actions of its disgraced former co-chairman, Gordon Caplan, who was among the liberal elites implicated in the “Varsity Blues” college admissions scandal. Caplan pleaded guilty in 2019 to paying $75,000 to fraudulently boost his daughter’s ACT score. He served a month in prison and was barred from practicing law for two years.
Big Doug needed to act fast to secure the bag. Kamala is probably going to run for governor of California in 2026 and has a decent shot of winning given the state’s unusual preference for incompetent Democrats. That means Emhoff has just two years to rake in as much private equity cash as he possibly can before he is pressured to step down due to “conflict of interest” rules. Emhoff abandoned his role as a partner at another white-shoe firm, DLA Piper, after Kamala was inaugurated as vice president in 2021.
Emhoff’s return to law practice is rife with controversy. Despite being widely praised by journalists for being a “modern-day sex symbol” and “taking a sledgehammer to toxic masculinity,” Emhoff was despised by normal Americans for destroying his first marriage by banging the nanny and for allegedly slapping an ex-girlfriend at the Cannes Film Festival in 2012. The hotshot lawyer’s tenure at the Los Angeles office of Venable LLP, where he served as managing director from 2006 to 2017, was plagued by allegations of sexual misconduct and discrimination.
FACT CHECK: Did Doug Emhoff Hire ‘Trophy Secretary’ at Pervy Law Firm? (PHOTOS)
A review of a recent job listing for a personal assistant at a major law firm—confirmed to have been placed by Emhoff, according to a Washington Free Beacon investigation—suggests the former second gentleman hasn’t changed much since being accused of hiring a “trophy secretary” named Katya who was “widely considered unqualified” but was nevertheless admired by male partners for her physical attractiveness and willingness to flirt with horny older men. The job listing is reprinted below for your immediate enjoyment:
Job Description: Personal assistant at major law firm.
Location: Los Angeles and New York.
Salary: $69,000 (off book) plus tips (cash and gifts).
Hours: As flexible as you are.
Responsibilities and Duties:
- Provide administrative, physical, and emotional relief to a high-status male partner who is currently enduring a stressful (albeit flexible) marriage to a prominent public figure with a notoriously irritating laugh.
- Appear presentable, available, and eager at all times.
- Boost morale around the office, engage other partners and VIP clients with charming banter.
- Accompany boss to meetings and events in appropriate (warm weather) attire.
- Laugh in a soothing and reassuring manner at the boss’s jokes. No cackling.
- Pretend to be friends with boss’s “alternative” daughter.
- Smile like your job depends on it—because it does.
- Know your way around a desk.
- Take notes, make calls, do the schedule and all that crap, if desired.
- Must be willing to travel and work from anywhere, including but not limited to hotel swimming pools, in-home massage parlors, and trampoline parks.
Recommended (Though Technically Not Required, for Legal Reasons) Qualifications & Skills:
- Conspicuously endowed with talent.
- Firmly and tightly committed to the open display of body positivity.
- Eager to reveal ample support for the advancement of modern feminist values.
- Because the vast majority of our senior employees are male, the firm’s mission to promote diversity, equity, and inclusion would be greatly enhanced if you happen to be female.
- Because most of our senior employees are married, the firm’s mission to promote diversity, equity, and inclusion would be greatly enhanced if you happen to be single.
- Because the vast majority of our senior employees are over the age of 60, the firm’s mission to promote diversity, equity, and inclusion would be greatly enhanced if you happen to be between the ages of 22 and 27.
- Because the vast majority of our senior employees are unable to meet the demanding physical requirements of the modeling industry, the firm’s mission to promote diversity, equity, and inclusion would be greatly enhanced if your bust-waist-hips measurements were in range of the 34-24-34 industry standard.
- Fetish-like obsession with maintaining discretion at all times.
- Possessed of a tender enthusiasm for extracurricular activities, including but not limited to water sports, hot yoga, and MDMA.
- Exquisitely honed commitment to upholding a woman’s right to terminate an unplanned pregnancy.
- Proficient in Venmo and Microsoft Office.
Original News Source – Washington Free Beacon
Running For Office? Conservative Campaign Management – Election Day Strategies!